First Steps Again

  “After he (Jesus) was raised from the dead, his disciples remembered he had said this, (about raising the destroyed temple in three days) and they believed both the Scriptures and what Jesus said.” John 2:22

 Even though the disciples walked and talked with Jesus and witnessed His miracles it would appear, according to this passage, they still hadn’t been convinced of His Divinity. Apparently, Thomas wasn’t the only doubting one. Poor Thomas. He really has ended up with short end of the stick. Maybe that’s what faith is…not being sure yet trusting in the process of learning and enlightenment.

  I realized yesterday that my quest to understand love has been more or less an intellectual exercise. To know love, it must be experienced. To experience it means (for me) taking risks… Risks? What risks?

  The risk isn’t in the loving, it is in the letting go of the countless fears broken love has forged in my heart. To be afraid is to stay safe in the box I have made for myself.

  (Long pause.)

  That’s not freedom. It is especially not freedom in Christ. It’s also not entirely true. There is risk to loving, too. Jesus knew this better than anyone.

  Is this why the Disciples were so hesitant to believe Jesus was who He said He was? Because to believe was to set aside everything they had known, everything they did according to the Law as people of the Jewish faith that, in the end, led directly to Jesus. They needed to step out of their own comfortable and well worn boxes.

  For any change to happen there needs to be a catalyst, a spark to fire the engines of new beginnings. Is that a redundant expression? Aren’t all beginnings new? Yah, they are because each time we start over, it is in a different time and space from where we began the first time. All new beginnings are born out of the experiences we have under out belts.

  The Disciples heard Jesus talk to the Pharisees about His resurrection but, like Thomas, they had to have a poke and a prod at the truth He had risen from the grave. Without actually seeing the fulfillment of Scriptures, they were incapable of fully believing in what He said. I guess that puts most of us in very good company.

  I made a sign for work. It’s placed in the transom window over the front door facing the street.

  “Every journey begins with one step.”

  Lord, I want to begin again only this time I want to experience the love that is the full expression of who You are. Teach me how to love others fearlessly and generously. In Jesus’ name I pray, AMEN!