Coming Clean

  “Then Abraham waited patiently, and he received what God had promised.” Hebrews 6:15

  Now, correct me if I am wrong, Abraham wasn’t that patient.  He went along with Sarah’s plan to have a child through his slave, Hagar, instead of waiting for God’s promise to be fulfilled. The promise being Sarah’s ability to have a child in her old age and that the child would be the first of their descendants who would grow to be more numerous than the stars. (Genesis 18)

  I wonder if this disobedience, this act of disbelief, haunted Abraham after Sarah finally bore him a son, Isaac, just as God had promised. Is this why God tested his faith later on when He asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac? To see if he had learned the discipline of patience? (Genesis 22)

  Hmmm…patience is a discipline. I never thought of it that way because patience and human mortality seem to be at odds with each other. When life is short, time is short and time spent waiting for anything takes forever.

  Today’s word is “trust.”

  There was a looooong pause… Smile… In the span of eternity, it wasn’t that long! But that just proves the point.

  I need to be careful here because I have realized that “patience” and “waiting on the Lord” can manifest itself as apathy. Apathy comes about as a result of living for (being afraid of?) a future that might or might not happen or by waiting for God to make things happen without any contribution on our, my, part.

  Yah. I stand convicted this morning because the truth of the matter is I’ve been wasting a lot of time submerged in useless games on my phone. It’s time to repent, to turn away from them because all they do is steal my heart and mind from God. It’s an old foe, an addiction I used to use to hide from the realities of life when life wasn’t all that good. And that’s the scary part. It is an addiction to the rush of adrenaline when points are scored, when levels are beaten.

  I think I have slipped into old patterns simply because I am feeling overwhelmed by all that is happening and needs to happen regarding the renos, work, going camping next week and the day to day requirements of living. (My blood pressure just spiked, my chest tightened, and the pins and needles of anxiety swept through my arms and legs at the thought. It is extremely unpleasant and perhaps is another reason I have been hiding in the games.)

  Nevertheless, after I finish today, I will delete all the games from my phone and tablet and give thanks that God is a God of endless second chances.

  Being proactive in faith isn’t the same as not being patient.  Being proactive, ideally, has its foundation in trust. Abraham understood this because he was proactive in obeying God’s command yet trusted God that everything would turn out just fine.

  While I may not know what the future will bring, I can give thanks this morning for being able to share, to confess, and ask God to help me break down my responsibilities into manageable pieces.

  God walked with Abraham as he woke early, saddled his donkey, chopped wood and walked for three days. He sustained him as he placed the wood for the sacrificial fire on his son’s shoulders and as he carried the knife which, for all he knew, would be used to kill his son.

  Patience sometimes requires action, a willingness to do, without knowing the ultimate truth of God's plan.

  I also need to repent of repeating to myself how hard it is to ask for help. It’s time that idea got tossed in the trash where it belongs along with all the “ideas” why it is hard. AMEN!