Weighty Matters by Susan L.

  I think I've got gout in my right foot's big toe. It's the disease of the rich man, a rich diet, and overindulgence. I looked it up in Wikipedia to find out more. First of all, I thought this was an illness of men and it usually is. It appears I am in the two percent of women who can get it.
  It surprises me because I don't eat meat very often. I don't drink alcohol at all. I am, however, rather overweight: a contributing factor. Too much sugar and carbs. Laying blame on my medications only goes so far although they were the driving force behind the initial desires for those two items. Now, I confess it's a full blown addiction complete with overwhelming, violent, physical cravings for SUGAR! And, yes, weight gain is a side effect for two out of the three psychotropic meds I take which only compounds the problem.
  Toss in age, this woman's time of life and I'm hit hard with other legitimate reasons for gaining weight. All the more reason to change the way I am living. A big toe is a warning sign that all is not well. I will make an appointment to see my doctor.
  Old habits of compulsive eating have also weaseled their way into my life again. I eat when I am stressed. I've been feeling stressed a lot lately. That would be okay if my life wasn't so sedentary but then, exercise helps with stress which would help me get off of that merry-go-round. I really need a mental make-over, not just physical...
  Somehow, because I know myself, I need to find a way to be accountable in order to lose weight. My self-discipline tends to fade in the face of a DIET. It means I have to find the stamina and willingness to cook better for myself, to eat better, and exercise way more than walking from couch to kitchen. This is more than dieting, this is lifestyle changing on a grand scale.
  I am heading to Florida in a couple of weeks. That will give me the opportunity to change my eating habits and hopefully kick some of the sugar cravings. I know it did last year for quite a while after I got home before the stress/eat/eat/stress cycle took over again.
  Walking on the beach will fill hours in the day because I enjoy it so much. I only need to maintain this routine when at home by finding a way to continue with the exercise. If that means paying for a gym by making a financial sacrifice elsewhere, so be it. God will provide. He always has.
  Lord, as much as I have said I lack self-discipline, You showed me I do have that trait. Point in proof being this blog. Help me, Lord, have discipline flow over into all aspects of my life. Guide my path so I might find the support I know will be needed to lose weight. Help me not give up in the face of that needing to be seventy pounds or more.
  Forgive me, Lord, for the bad habits, for using food to fill my soul, for not having turned to You sooner. Fill me with a willing desire to make the changes needed and guide me on the paths of opportunity. Help me turn to Your Word instead of the pantry cupboard. Help me, Lord, embrace the idea that I am worth taking care of. In Jesus' name, Amen.
  "Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing." Lk 12:23