The Need for Boundaries

  “Everyone must submit to governing authority. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God.” Romans 13:1

  Passage chosen for the day. Check. Knowing what else to write. Not so much…

  The squirrel brain is having a hayday and is focusing on everything else that is going on and has happened over the last couple of days.

  Mostly I am struggling with having to set boundaries and it ending up causing a great deal of hurt. A visitor from the centre came to my church, having been invited by someone else. I was delighted to see them there but because of work policies that clearly set out the rules about visitor contact with staff outside of the centre, it was necessary to define the limitations of our relationship. The policy clearly states staff is not to have any contact at all with visitors outside the centre but I live in a small community. It’s bound to happen that paths cross.

  It’s hard to make someone welcome, to be inclusive yet ask that they respect these boundaries. The policies are in place for visitor and staff safety as well as confidentiality. Breaking them could mean I could lose my job.

  Sigh. This isn’t the first time this type of conversation has been necessary and I feel like crap every time I have to go through the spiel.

  Perhaps I am taking on too much responsibility for how someone receives this information. I am not the only person going to church. Personal relationships can develop that don’t include me. It is everyone's choice whether or not to take advantage of getting to know the other wonderful people in my church family. I am also not responsible for someone choosing not to come because they have an issue with my employer’s policies. That I can give to God.

 

  Thank You, Lord for making sure this passage was in the Bible because it is important for me to honour the rules of my employment and not because of a fear of retribution but because I heartily agree with the need for boundaries. I, too, need safe places to go and be my vulnerable self, to be supported.  It is important to be able to set boundaries even though it is something I struggle with. Only practice will make it easier. Only practice will help me overcome the belief that I am responsible for how others feel when a much needed boundary has been put in place. That, also, can be given to God.

  AMEN!

More Decisions

  “I, the Lord, define the ocean’s sandy shoreline as an everlasting boundary that the waters cannot cross. The waves may toss and roar, but they can never pass the boundaries I set.” Jeremiah 5:22

  I wasn’t expecting to find this passage highlighted in blue which means this passage is directly connected to the life of Jesus. This passage was chosen because it contained the word, “sandy.” Why “sandy?”  Because I have spent the last three weeks with countless paint samples from different companies taped to the wall trying to find the perfect colour of sand.

  It made me smile because I had laughingly given my mom a hard time when it took her over six months to choose a cream colour for their home. It has never taken me so long to pick a colour but  what I thought was a nice sand colour in the store can turn pink in the sunlight (ew) or a darker one turns a dirty, flat green in the night (ick); when beige goes gray on a cloudy day (blah)…so much can influence the colour of sand.

  Finally the choices are narrowed down to two which is way better than thirty! They are almost identical but one is a touch warmer with a hint of sunshine to it. It might have been an easier choice if I had used the black sand beaches of New Zealand as my colour palette. Not. Although black does have a place in home décor. (Now doesn’t that sound all designer-y. Smile.)

  Why is this so important? Because I have chosen a sand coloured Florida sea shell to be my colour guide for all the renos, aiming for an Algonquin park, northern beach get-a-way feel to the house without a smidgen of pink anywhere in sight. Except for the floral patterned chair in my living room, a sentimental piece. It has splashes of pink but I can live with it because the chair was a special gift. I might even go so far as to admit I like it!

 

  I have to copy this Scripture passage out so that every time I look at the walls I will remember the infinite power and majesty of God. So I will remember the strength that comes from faith. I will also remember and celebrate the infinite variety of colours sand can be.

  The next time I am at a beach I will scoop up a handful of sand and marvel at the millions of colours held in the palm of my hand. God does everything far and beyond the limits of my human expectations. AMEN!

What's New

“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him.” Romans 15:13

  As the reno date draws near, there have been a considerable amount of things to accomplish which is why I have been remiss in posting these last couple of days. My focus simply wasn’t on writing.

  The pathway leading to the side door has been demolished. A task that was far more tiring than when I put it in. (Smile.) But, then, I was ten years younger. A big, decorative hunk of granite that weighs at least a hundred pounds has been left for when the excavator comes. (Another smile.) It had been moved into place by yours truly a decade ago. All the plants and topsoil have been removed from the gardens on that side. It was rather amazing how many wheelbarrow loads it took! Although, they too were smaller than the ones I hauled the dirt in with ten years ago.

  It was one of those hot, sweaty, and dirty jobs that makes having a shower when it’s done extra enjoyable.

  The kitchen stuff in the cupboards is down to bare bones. All that remains to pack is what I need to cook and eat with.

  I am becoming more and more excited and can’t wait for things to begin!

  For someone who doesn’t enjoy shopping very much, wandering around a hardware store looking at a variety of things like toilets, door hardware, light fixtures, and a sundry of other home related products is fun! Maybe it’s the smell of sawn wood that creates a wholesome, hopeful aroma.

  Smell is an amazing catalyst for memories to rise up from the depths. When I was little, I would accompany my dad on shopping trips for whatever home reno project he had on the go. There was always something being re-made, re-built or improved. The fragrance of newly cut wood always reminds me of these trips with Dad in his button-down plaid work shirt and bolo tie. T-shirts had no place in his wardrobe even if the trip to the hardware store was to only buy more nails.

  Being triggered by a scent isn't always a bad thing at all.

  The nesting Mourning Dove has surprised me. Here I thought she was still sitting on eggs when I spied two juvenile fledglings all of a sudden ready to go. It seemed that she never left the nest even when it was crowded. The little ones, still a little bit fluffy, with spotted feathers, were wandering around my patio this morning. It’s nice to see. I suppose the male had fed the lot or she only left the nest when I wasn’t spying on the events in the pine tree. Did she know when the car left there would be ample privacy for her to do whatever lady doves do?

  Some amazing things happen when we aren’t looking. Some amazing things happen even when we are looking! But looking and seeing aren’t the same things at all.

  I know this hasn’t been much of an exploration of scripture this morning but God knows my brain is busy. I am thankful that, despite the flurry of busy-ness, my anxiety hasn’t gotten out of control.  It’s rather amazing and a reflection of how much my trust in the Lord has grown lately. AMEN!

Something Completely Different

“Let someone else praise you, not your own mouth—a stranger, not your own lips.” Proverbs 27:2

  Something very different happened last Wednesday. A man with a broken down motorcycle was attempting to boost start the engine at the end of my driveway. It didn’t work. He was amazed when I told him he could leave it in my driveway; to just pull it off to the side and away from the road so it would be safe and out of the way.

  After the car driver left, the stranded motorcyclist shared he was staying in a hostel about an hour from here. He also had no one to call to come pick him up so he planned on hitchhiking back.

  It was a hot evening. It was a long way on foot being at least an hour’s drive away.  My heart was more than happy to drive him there myself but I felt rather nervous of being alone with him in the car. Distrusting trust? Is there such a thing? He seemed like a nice enough fellow and small enough to not be physically threatening but nevertheless…so I approached my neighbour to see if she would be willing to go for a drive.

  The end result was a lovely tour along roads I’d never traveled, on a beautiful summer evening as the sun set in gold and crimson glory. That was a real treat. I don’t see the sun set very often because my home is in a valley and is surrounded by large trees.

  It was also nice to have company on the way home with a neighbour I’ve had some minor conflict with in the past. It gave us a chance to chat. Hopefully our re-connection and the laugh shared when I got lost coming home will have resolved any residual bad feelings.

  My unexpected passenger told me the driver who had pulled up to give him a boost had seen him pushing the dead motorcycle along the road. He had gone home to get booster cables then came back to try and get the bike started.

  I guess I am sharing this because it is nice to hear of people doing good for someone else: the car driver with booster cables and my neighbour who was decidedly nervous being in the car with a strange man yet set aside her fear to help get him home.

  This isn’t the first time someone in need of aid has landed on my doorstep. It happened frequently over the years on the farm mostly because a nearby curve in the gravel road caused many a driver to end up in the ditch. One autumn there was a woman who was simply standing at the side of the road for an hour. I approached her, finding her incoherent and, I found out later, had been walking for hours before we got involved. That time we called the police. Had we not gotten involved, she probably would have died from exposure during the night. Her light clothing would have been insufficient for the weather.

  In sharing this, it is not to toot my own horn because I am deeply honoured that God brings people in need to my doorstep. I am thankful for having the ability to help in some small way. I am thankful I live in a community where strangers are still willing to help strangers. 

AMEN!

?

  “Instead we should write and tell them to abstain from eating food offered to idols, from sexual immorality, from eating the meat of strangled animals, and from consuming blood. For these laws of Moses have been preached in Jewish synagogues in every city on every Sabbath for many generations.” Acts 15:19-21

  Again I am confused. This passage came about because the Pharisees who believed in Jesus were attempting to insist Gentile believers follow the Jewish Law. I understand that sexual immorality is not the behaviour of true believers simply because sex for the sake of sex isn’t an expression of love.

  But what about these dietary restrictions? Is it because food offered to idols is only found near idols? Therefore a believer would have to be in the idol’s temple or in front of a shrine in order to access the food. Is it because merely being in the presence of an idol has risk?

  Knowing how easily the Hebrews were enthralled by their golden calf (before Moses came down from the mountain with the Ten Commandments) is point and proof that idols can lead us astray very easily. And knowing how easily I am distracted by my own range of idols...less is more.

  So what about strangled animals and the consumption of blood? (This might be gory for some readers.) A chicken whose throat is cut has a beating heart that pumps the blood out until it dies from lack of blood. The meat is cleaner. (Yet another farm lesson.)

  A strangled chicken must be hung upside down until gravity causes the blood to drain into the head. Sometimes there are remnants of blood found in the veins and arteries throughout the bird once it has been plucked and cleaned. Of the two, a cut throat is the more merciful way of executing an animal although now it is required by chicken processors that the animals be knocked unconscious prior to cutting their throat. (I am thankful not to have to do this sort of thing anymore.)

  How does the Last Supper challenge this? We drink wine, not actual blood although there are faiths which believe the wine actually changes to blood…I am more confused than ever…

  Lord, I am short on time this morning and long on questions. I pray You will guide me into understanding and clarity. In Jesus’ name. AMEN!

Between the Lines

  “Instead, take the lowest place at the foot of the table (instead of the seat of honor). Then when your host sees you, he will come and say, ‘Friend, we have a better place for you!’ Then you will be honored in front of all the other guests.” Luke 14:10

  Upon reading this passage a whole bunch of thoughts erupted because it seems to contradict many of Jesus’ other teachings. Doesn’t being honored in front of everyone seem a trifle self serving as opposed to humble? How can this passage possibly fit into being the people we are called to be?

  Hmmm…unless I am reading this from a perspective of how I would feel, how pride would work its way into my heart by being singled out. I think, if this is the case, it would be better for me to sit where I sat away from the places of honor. But that, too, can become easily prideful…”Look at how humble I am! I refused to move!”

  What a conundrum!

  Unless Jesus is referring to His humble self being honored above all others.

  The conversation with the Samaritan woman comes to mind in John 4. Jesus sat by the well, and in all humility asked her for a drink. The woman discovered He was the Messiah and raced back to tell her village. Jesus was invited to come and affirm who He was. The rest of the village soon believed He was the Messiah. A humble seat by the side of a well and a non-conforming conversation with a woman soon became a place of honor.

  Or could this be a clear depiction of what it takes to come to Jesus? When life is rife with troubles, when the soul is empty, done, lost, when our seat is at the foot of the table or under it, God comes along and says, “Friend, I have a better place for you.”

  Then our story becomes one of redemption, of being raised up. And all our friends stand witness to the changes God can and will do in our lives. And that is the greatest honor of all.

Expressions of Faith

  “God knows people’s hearts, and he confirmed that he accepts Gentiles by giving them the Holy Spirit, just as he did to us. He made no distinction between us and them, for he cleansed their hearts through faith.” Acts 15:8-9

  Sunday’s teaching has stretched me yet again. The lesson was taught by an Aboriginal elder, Terry Leblanc, who challenged us to think about how we often view other’s faith in Jesus through a lens of prejudice. The title of the lesson was, “Why Can’t You Just Be Like Me?” It was very powerful and can be accessed at www.themeetinghouse.com

  The context of this passage is believers belonging to the sect of the Pharisees felt the Christian Gentiles needed to follow Jewish law as part of their faith practices. Paul’s response to this was, “Why are you now challenging God by burdening the Gentile believers with yoke that neither we nor our ancestors were able to bear?” v.10

  In a conversation with a friend, the idea of a Christian moral code came up. It’s something every single believer, regardless of how long they have believed, should live up to. NOT! Boy those are ugly words. They disarm grace, they are punishingly cruel, they are probably the reason fewer people come to Christ.

  I’ve heard many times the reason they don’t want to follow Jesus is because they have to give up too much. Mr. Leblanc and his wife, as new believers, burned everything in their home that even hinted at their Aboriginal heritage. To believe was to snuff out anything that wasn’t just like everyone else.

  I am, was, a big Steven King fan owning almost all his books. I believed, as a Christian, these horror novels should not be in my home so the shelf was purged…except for three I simply couldn’t part with. The Stand, The Green Mile and The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon were a crucial part in my journey to finding God. (Smile.) He wasn’t lost, I was!

  This slight “disobedience” has enabled me to embrace the belief that God is in all things and He will use all things for His Glory. While I rarely crack the pages of these books, they have a place on my bookshelf and serve to remind me that it was God who pursued me and not the other way around. They fanned the flames for my own, hunger filled quest for the Holy Grail that eventually led to me finding it in the person of Jesus.

  Do I believe everyone should go for walks in the woods as part of their faith practices? No. Do I believe everyone should use art as a form of prayer? No. Have I wrestled with the idea that these two things are un-Christian or wrong? Yes. Simply because they are a different way of connecting with my Maker and don’t seem to fall within the parameters of what church should look like.

  I don’t worship the trees. I listen to the sounds of the wind through their branches and my heart joins them in their whispered celebration of the Creator of all things.

  I have been challenged this week to reflect on other people’s faith practices and the tools they use to connect with God on a personal and intimate level. My own prejudice towards Aboriginal rites and rituals has been shaken loose. (Forgive me, Lord, for having been so judgmental and suspicious and fear filled.)

  It all boils down to realizing God can speak all languages. A person who follows Jewish law can be a Christian. An person who beats a drum whose very existence tells a story and sings praises to our God is my brother and sister. 

  I don't think God had intended for prejudice and fear to be such a big part of our being with people of like minds. After He made every individual, He broke the mold.