I am rushing out of the house again this morning: places to go, people to see. Little knots of anxiety are building in my stomach. I was about to say, "I don't do busy very well", then I realised what was happening. The more I say something, the more I believe it. Some call it a self-fulfilling prophecy. Others call it a word curse. Words have incredible power. They can build up, tear down, encourage, humiliate, strengthen, weaken. The list goes on.
Is my own choice of language impeding my recovery and ability to live a full life? I am afraid so. That's what cognitive behaviour therapy is all about. It's about changing language and replacing 'bad' thoughts with positive. Yes, I have tried that tool but found it didn't get to the "why". Why do I think/feel/act the way I do?
Here's the question of the day: why am I so afraid of being busy? In Christ we can do all things.
I've an opportunity to think about this today. And I will.
"He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death, and broke their chains in pieces. Oh, that men would give thanks to the Lords for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the children of men!" Ps 107:14-15
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The Robes
"Coming up behind Jesus, she (the woman who had bled for 12 years) touched the fringe of His robe." Luke 9:44 And she was heal...
Don't be hard on yourself. Yes, we need to turn our eyes from ourselves and to Christ - in Whom we can do all things - but only through Him. Realizing we can't "do stuff - a lot of stuff" is the beginning of wisdom in a way. It is when we realize this that we can rely on Him, His strength, and give Him the glory. Sometimes it is hard to take than from our heads to our hearts. I imagine you are coming from a dark hole, a pit, where you spiraled around and around. You are now walking on a path - and you will need to take baby steps. "Whatever is true, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things." Phil. 4:8 Asking God the "why" may reveal such wonderful things. Pacing yourself it not a bad thing. If you are at all like me, if I am overwhelmed, I am ineffective. I have fear of being too busy - and I know I just can't do it - I get sick, don't sleep, and disappointment myself. I need not measure myself against anyone else. Just what my loving Father wants.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Anonymous, your gentle wisdom has hit home.
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