Duck Day by Susan L.

  Confidence.
  It's growing.
  It's recognizing that I am a bit of an odd duck and being okay with it. (Perhaps eccentric might be a kinder word but that doesn't create such an amusing visual. Waddle. Waddle.)
  Different.
  Last week at worship team rehearsal, there was a great conversation about songs and groups from the past. Not all of those mentioned were worship songs. Some were. I mostly sat and listened, feeling the familiar feelings of the outsider. My background is classical/big band music. A great number of the songs I like are from the 40's and 50's (waaaay before my time!). It's what I grew up on. As for worship music, except for the golden oldies, it is mostly unfamiliar although the Lord has turned some of my favorite love songs into an opportunity for praise and worship anyways. It's the heart that counts.
  The music I've been writing lately has no lyrics. It's a hybrid of organ technique and piano that strives to paint pictures with notes. It has yet to be played for anyone so I have no idea if it does what it's supposed to do. Is it any good?
  Does it matter?
  It's different.
  There's been many hurts from those who preyed on my belief that different made me an outcast. I can smile about that now and even find grace and forgiveness for those who did the hurting. God has forgiven me for the things I've done to try and "fit in. There was a lot to repent of. There's been much healing on all fronts.
  The longing for belonging has vanished because I finally get it.
  I am God's child, ducks and all.
  "But Jesus turned around, and when He saw her He said, "Be of good cheer, daughter; your faith has made you well." And the woman was made well from that hour." Mat 9:22