Tuesday, 19 April 2016

Lyrics by Susan L.

  This poet/musician is attempting to write and compose worship music. Being exposed to modern songs and growing more familiar with their structure, has created a bit of a box. It's very hard for me to write in that format yet it feels like I must persist. The biggest issue is working with the repetitious lyrics so common in worship music these days. Sometimes that irks me. I have a fondness for old hymns and gospel songs.
  It's so much easier composing classical style music that tells a story without words!
  What has come out of these attempts has ended up being along the lines of folk songs that tell a story of faith. The verse, chorus, verse pattern keeps popping up. So far anything I've written is a bit sketchy and needs polishing. Snatches of ideas for both words and melody keep bubbling up but don't seem to go anywhere. I bounce from idea to idea. It's frustrating. A sense of inadequacy leaves me sitting on a judgement pedestal, criticizing what is taking shape.
  "Now, Susan, you know better!"
  If these compositions are being forced into a mold, it means I am not allowing the Holy Spirit to do all the work for me. That's a much easier way for creativity to flow. Forgive me Lord, for ignoring that Inner Voice!
  And I am having a good laugh at myself. So much of my creative ability comes from many hours of practicing listening to that Voice so being challenged is a tough pill to swallow. Although I think the challenges are all in my head because of how I am addressing this new expression of the voice God gave me.
  Which begs the question: who exactly am I writing for? Who am I trying to impress? Why am I even thinking of the future?  Why do I feel that this is leading to a need to perform? Why am I so concerned about possible rejection? Why am I asking all these questions?
  Oh, my goodness, so much baggage!
  My humanity is getting in the way.
  So, Lord, I lift this enterprise up to You. Help me place my trust in Your abilities to fill my heart and soul with song. Help me let go of doubt. Help this stubborn need to control stay out of the way so that Your will for the music becomes my will. In Jesus' most precious name, I pray.
  "And when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathen do. For they think that they will be heard for their many words. Therefore do not be like them. For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him." Mat 6:7-8

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