Thursday, 1 January 2015

Happy New Year! by Susan L.

  The old calendar comes down, the new one goes up. It's hard to believe it's 2015, that another year has come and gone. It was a good year despite the hiccups in the spring with the anxiety issue. Glad that got fixed.
  It was a year of accomplishment for me: building the shed, painting the living room, the baseboards installed, the newspaper column, being well and graduating from the PREFER program. The high point was being able to spend more time with my grandchildren.
  Doing the DNA test has brought a great deal of peace. It's nice to know where you come from even if I don't pursue anything further. It's helped me appreciate the gift of being adopted by a loving family and a heavenly One.
  Being adopted means being accepted, not rejected. Funny, I never realized that was an issue.
  It's been a harvest year. Not just in physical accomplishments, but there's been emotional milestones reached. Confidence like I've never felt before has been building and at the same time settling into my soul. It's a strength based in faith and humble gratitude towards the One who has enabled me to reach this place. I wouldn't be here without it or Him.
  There's a deeper appreciation for the gifts and abilities the Lord has blessed me with. I am better at speaking up when others try and compare their skills to mine. It used to be a source of guilt. I can thank my co-worker for the answer. My abilities in art, writing and music require hours of dedication and a deep desire to hone those skills. It didn't happen overnight. (Thanks Mom, for urging me to practice!) Yup, more confidence.
  Although I am still not one to look to the future or to plan very much ahead, the fear of the future has eased. Which basically means the fear of my mental health collapsing has faded. I'm not sure if it will ever be gone completely but it's far better than it was.
  I can dare to dream.
  Turning fifty has meant an end to being in my forties, the most difficult decade of my life. Yay! Like I said, harvest time! Praise God!
  And a Happy New Year to you all! May you be richly blessed.
  "Remember your Creator before the silver cord is loosed, or the golden bowl is shattered, or the pitcher shattered at the fountain, or the wheel broken at the well. Then the dust will return to the earth as it was, and the spirit will return to God who gave it." Eccl 12:6-7

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