Healing Space by Susan L.

It's been tough going, doing my blog this week. Every morning has been an exercise in patience as I sit with my coffee and wait for Inspiration to speak to me. There's been a lot of halfhearted, random scribblings not worth sharing: the weather, the garden, the cat. I've been reluctant to delve into matters of the heart because there's a huge part of me that has needed to play; to celebrate the work the Lord did in my soul and spirit last weekend. (Was it only last weekend?!) It takes time for new understandings to settle in to every fibre of my being. Being outside in the sun brings even more healing. The shadows vanish as I get dirty, enjoy the birdsong and relishing the feel of warm earth between my toes. All followed by a long, hot shower where I watch the dirt disappear down the drain. This playtime is healing, too. Watching butterflies and bees drink at the flowers stirs up simple, childish delight. God's timing is impeccable. Every night the fireflies have been out so I stand outside in my pajamas and delight in them, too. These little things breathe joy into my soul. "I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears." PS 34:4

Strange Encounters by Susan L.

It's a beautiful morning and as I was taking it all in, the fresh air, the bird song, a movement at the end of the driveway caught my eye. It was a small, black weasel like creature. I thought it was a Marten at first. I had chased one off of a rooster years ago. This wasn't anywhere near as large. It saw me and made a bee line straight towards where I was standing. This is odd. Is it rabid? It didn't seem aggressive. I realized it was a pure black ferret. It sat up and looked at me after sniffing around my slippers. She was painfully thin and there was evidence she had young somewhere. I wondered if she had been a cruel pet dump. Someone's unwanted pet. I hate when people use that as an option. I went and got a handful of cat food. She knew what it was and ate heartily. She was a bit skittery and wary but it wasn't disturbed by my presence. I was reluctant to pick her up or catch her in case she had young. Eventually she went on her way. Hopefully I'll see her again today and be able to give her some more food. "Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels." He 13:2

Bouncy, Bouncy bu Susan L.

I can't seem to string two sentences together this morning. Brain bounce. I'll spare you my ramblings. Hopefully it will be better tomorrow! "The preparations of the heart belong to men. But the answer of the tongue is the Lord. " PS 16:1

Honoured by Susan L.

My boss asked if I would be willing to tell my story of recovery at the upcoming general meeting in August. It is a great honour to be asked and exciting as well. Although the question is, where to start? It has been quite the journey, and continues to be a work in progress. In looking back, the last nine years seems a long time but who I was nine years ago is so not the person who posts this blog. For those who have read the boot story (Set In Stone) there has been another bit of insight. I was that newspaper. And there it is. Thank You Lord for giving me a place to start. As I share my story, let my story be Your story. Guide my pen to touch the hearts of others that they may find affirmation and hope. In Jesus' name I pray. "As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God." 1 Pet 4:10

Niches by Susan L.

Learning curves...it sure isn't a straight line is it? I picked up my firefly painting from the framers yesterday. She did an awesome job! This process challenged me on so many levels. Just surrendering the original art into a stranger's hands was a risky chance. Especially when I feel that it is the best piece I ever painted as well as it signifies such a powerful spiritual and emotional connection to God. I am thankful about being able to step outside my comfort zone, big steps and little ones. I am thankful that the realization has solidified that it's totally my decision about what to do or not. Is that ever freeing! I have offered my artistic services to the church. I am happy to help make props or whatever they need for their summer Bible camp. I will leave the actual camp in the hands of others, though. Way too much caffuffle and chaos for me! At the Writer's Nest for the first time I wrote something off topic! (Look out, world, we're creating a monster!) Yesterday's blog time was spent exploring a whimsical story about a brick I saw dented by a cat's foot print. It was a nice bit of lightness to celebrate the lightness in my soul. I truly enjoy writing children's stories. Thank You, Lord for helping me find my place in this world. "It was planted in good soil by many waters, to bring forth branches, bear fruit, and become a majestic vine," Ez 17:8 (Thank You Lord for many prunings.)

Recovery by Susan L.

Yet another sunny day was spent in the garden. There's still more to do but that's okay, I'm not feeling so terribly, suffocatingly, overwhelmed any more. I had to stop when numerous mosquitoes plagued me looking for a quick meal. Towards evening it was most enjoyable to sit on the patio with my good friend H. She came over with a lovely chocolate and fruit dessert for us to share. Good friend? No, BEST friend! There was a young robin hiding in the grass. We watched the parents fly copious amounts of grubs and squishy things to its ever demanding beak. The baby looked like a leaf in the grass, its feathers not quite grown in. Too bad they don't eat mosquitoes! Simple joys. Healing joys that help the wounds of spiritual surgery close. They help to shake off the last of the shadows in my heart, the haunting remnants that take some time to disappear. The fireflies were out last night,too. They were twinkling high among the tree branches. A contented smile came to my lips and a flood of good memories washed over me. My painting of these little bursts of light is ready to be picked up. Redemption. God's timing is always perfect. "I thought it good to declare the signs and wonders that the Most High God has worked for me." Dan 4:2

Raised Spirits by Susan L.

It was nice to spend most of yesterday in my poor, neglected garden. Weeds have gained a strong foothold. By the time I was done, dirt covered almost every piece of exposed skin. A sign of lots accomplished and a good day. I needed the time to allow the repercussions of the latest paradigm shift work their way into my heart, soul and spirit. Wounds I didn't know were there are healed. Misunderstandings are set aside. Detrimental core beliefs are exposed and disposed of as Godly truth takes their place. It happens so fast when God lovingly kisses the broken spots, validating the pain. And I am thankful. And repentant,too. I am and was far from perfect. And relieved as bitter helplessness, the black river, and the cloak of victimization are once again set aside. Vanquished. Sometimes I need to go there for a while, be a victim I mean, even though every fibre of my being rebels because it is such an ugly place. I know my prayers not to be a bitter, spiteful woman will be answered. There's that and I need to let that piece of me have a voice. She deserves being heard. I've been a silent captive for far too long. "The heart knows its own bitterness, and a stranger does not share its joy." Prov 14:10