Wednesday 13 June 2018

Affirmation 281

  I am useful for His glory. Isaiah 43:7
  "Everyone who is called by My name, whom I have created for My glory; I have formed him, Yes, I have made him." NKJV
  "Bring all who claim me as their God, for I made them for my glory. It was I who created them." JCB

  I had a dream last night. It is rare for me to remember but this one woke me. It wasn't a nightmare but a revelation that has me rethinking fear.
  I wish I could remember the details this morning but all that is left is a feeling of peace and curiosity. I vaguely remember an epiphany about when I started being afraid and how layer after layer of fear was added to that moment.
  It feels strange to be sitting here without fear...well maybe not entirely. But mostly.
  Perhaps last night's dream was an infusion of hope, grace and acceptance for all that has happened.

  There has been a lot of big emotions come my way over the last few days. Joy, Yes! My miracle granddaughter arrived in the world yesterday morning. The visit from my childhood friend. Because of her visit, another childhood friend connected with me.
  Big emotions. A couple or three hours of piano playing helped to pare them down into not so overwhelming. It's helped me realize how complicated feelings are! Laughter and tears...I don't need to be afraid of either joy or sorrow any more.
  I am eternally grateful the Lord turned the emotion switch on. There was a victory yesterday because the sorrows stirred up didn't suck me down into the Black River. I think there has finally been some closure. Is that why so much fear is gone?
  Maybe the greatest thing I can do to glorify my Lord is to live fearlessly and boldly. Maybe I can finally embrace relationships without the fear of loss holding my heart back. Yes, Lord, that means with you as well!
 
 

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