What Does It Look Like? by Susan L.

  I wrote something the other day in a post. "I cannot hate."
  The amazing series at church called, "Love, Lust and Loyalty" with Bruxy Cavey is revealing the misconceptions and misunderstandings I've learned regarding relationships and gender roles.
  The big question, even though I cannot hate, is: can I love?
  The next big question is: can I break through the fear so love is possible?
  Maybe this is looking at it the wrong way. By myself, I can't love to the degree Jesus calls us to. In Him and through Him I can.
  1 Corinthians 13:4-8 is all about this greatest gift. I stumble over the first line. "Love suffers long." What exactly does that mean? If I substitute the word love for Jesus (He is Love), it then reads "Jesus suffers long." In the name of love, He bore rejection, abandonment, hatred, denial, and the weight of the cross for us. Is that what it means to love in a broken world? I can say from personal experience, yes! Even the cross I bear, the PTSD, is a result of having loved.
  Forgive me, Lord, for my fear of opening my heart, of being vulnerable. Hmmm, that isn't a hundred percent true because it is something I do often. This is about trusting the Holy Spirit who leads me into that place of vulnerability and trust when it comes to relationships with my fellow human beings. He helps me understand the how another person needs to be loved.
  Loving another isn't the same as allowing myself to be abused or subjugated. This is the life long lesson that is so hard for me to set aside in my quest for understanding love. The two have been inseparable.
  Distrust isn't hate. Discerning whether or not a person is to be trusted isn't the same as withholding love. I am not sure of the scripture but at one point Jesus sent His disciples out to various towns. When they were rejected, He told them to move on. Did they pray for those souls who weren't ready for the Good News?
  Jesus bore the lashes, the crown of thorns in the name of love so I don't have to...ever again.
  Sometimes saying, "No" is love in action. Learning to say "No" as an act of love instead of self-preservation will take some practice.

  Now that's a huge breakthrough in understanding.

  I can also admit that Jesus was not the head of the household in my marriage. Christian principles however were taken out of context to enforce a position of power and eradicate accountability. My own misunderstandings of Christian principles also made me open to being subjugated. This takes me back to the top of the page and the incredibly insightful, thought provoking teaching which has changed my thinking so much. It is available online via The Meetinghouse's website.
  "And now abide in faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love." 1 Cor 13:13