Warning: The contents of this post may be disturbing to some readers.
There will be no picture for this prompt.
I'd thought to do a lovely drawing of a little child with a teddy bear. In a few moments before work, I searched online for suitable inspiration. "Toddlers with teddy bears". How cute!! There were lots to choose from: delightful poses of children with their beloved, fuzzy companions. As I scrolled down, a pair of pictures of a little, middle-Eastern boy came up.
A flag of ISIS hung on wall the behind him. He was dressed as a soldier and held a huge knife in the air with a delighted smile on his face.
This was not a Halloween costume.
The second image of this little boy was him taking the knife and beheading his big, fluffy, white teddy bear.
These images showed up multiple times having been shown in British newspapers and various other media platforms. It was the first time I had seen them. I had to ask, "What had this child seen or been taught that he would know to do this?"
Many years ago, I watched a movie about the "Troubles" in Northern Ireland. In this movie was a clip from a parade. It doesn't matter if the parade was Catholic or Protestant. What matters was the image of a little, cute-as-a-button, black haired girl, standing on the sidelines. I have never forgotten her because her face was a mask of fury as she screamed hate-filled words at those who were walking past.
What do I do in a world that teaches its children to hate?
What do I do with the sorrow seeing these images and remembering the movie brings to my heart?
What do I do with the knowledge that there's a staggering number of grownups who have lived a childhood of sexual, emotional and physical abuse? What do I do with the knowledge that abusers, 99.9% of the time, had been victims themselves? They are rarely strangers. They are people we love, and trust.
What do I do for these broken, little boys and little girls in an adult's body?
What can I do to create compassion for the victim-abuser? While I don't condone the choices they've made, I cannot condemn them either. It's fine to say they should know better but did anyone ever think that maybe they don't? Did anyone ever think that maybe, just maybe, there wasn't a grownup in their lives who cherished them, encouraged them, loved them? Chances are, there wasn't someone who taught them what "better" could be.
Maybe they were hoping to get caught because maybe then someone would save them from the nightmares of childhood. Instead, they are hated even more.
What do I do for the victims? What do I do for the victimizers? What do I do to help heal terrible wounds? What can I do to give them the gift of hope?
Oh, Lord, I am so sad.
We are taught to hate. We are not born with hate in us.
I once was a mom with little ones. A lifetime ago it seems now. Those little ones now have little ones of their own.
Thank You, Abba, for telling me what I can do. Help me be the best grandmother I can to all the little ones, big bodied and small, You bring into my life. In Jesus' name I pray, as tears finally spill over my cheek.
Amen.
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Boundary Study Part 2
"Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God--truly righteous and holy...
You ask what you should do so many times here, it makes me wonder if you feel some responsibility to fix all this brokenness. I hope you aren't taking burdens upon yourself that are not yours to bear. We must turn to Jesus in order to not be overcome by sorrow or despair when we look at the state of the world today, and acknowledge how much sin He took upon Himself on the cross. We must pray: for victims, for perpetrators, for the poor, the misguided, our leaders... This is more of a spiritual battle than a human one... it is the powers of evil who magnify the sins of humans to bring about such a degree of darkness. And yes, we shower love on those around us, especially the vulnerable ones. Love overcomes much. And we must trust that God is in control, and Jesus is the light that overcomes the darkness, now and forever.
ReplyDeleteThe question, "What do I do?" was more about me asking, "How can I make my own small part in this world a better place? What can I do to ease the suffering?" as opposed to me fixing the brokenness of others. This was about fanning the fires of compassion for our fellow human beings in all their brokenness. While I cannot fix them, I am a Light bearer, a vessel of the Holy Spirit, a candle of hope for the hopeless. As you said, we are to shower love on those around us. This much I can do.
DeleteI agree with H. Be careful you don't take on what you should be laying in the capable Hands of our Heavenly Father. He knows what is best. We cannot judge the motives of people, but we can judge their actions. People need to be accountable for their choices. Yes, they may have not been loved like they should, given guidance as they should, given better choices - when they were children/youth. But there is little excuse as adults. Let us us the example of someone being overweight (I pick that because it includes me). True - they may have been brought up in a poor household where food was just a filler and included anything that was cheap that did the trick. They also may not have had educated parents that understood anything about nutrition and the needs of a healthy body. The parents also didn't value or include physical activities or sports - some due to finances, some due to lack of time. Perhaps all the money went towards survival and medications - not for fun and developing arts. Let us say this produces a few heavy, unfit, and unmotivated children. Further, lets say a sexual abuse led to hiding any possibility of beauty, or attempts of it, lest it be misconstrued. Cheap fast food, sneaking more available snacks, hiding behind walls might become the norm as the children grew. Can you excuse the 35 year old's behavior in the same manner as a 12 year old? No. There is information and helps all around. There is programs, often free, and medical help. If a 35 - 40 year old chooses not to eat properly or exercise - notice that is a CHOICE. We need to be responsible for our choices and stop blaming everyone else for our problems. Maybe we weren't loved as we should have been, maybe bad habits were picked up - but who is in the driving seat now. Whose arm reaches for the chips and the remote? Knowing someone's past may lead us to better understanding, but challenging them to face the now and plan their future is more productive. Woe is me, poor me gets tired real fast. All our days are a series of choices. Good or bad - they are ours. We can excuse a little girl hurling vile comments overheard from her parents, family and culture - but those same comments can not be tolerated, and should not be tolerated, from a grown person. We can indeed love them and show them Jesus, the better way, but we must be careful not to excuse them.
ReplyDeleteI absolutely DO NOT condone the choices a sexual predator makes. I wasn't looking to excuse or justify those choices. I wholeheartedly agree they need to be kept apart from children.
DeleteThis bearing of my heart was about our responsibility as adults for the shaping of children's lives, minds and hearts. It was about adult behaviours and choices that have far reaching consequences.
It was written because of the sorrow that we teach our children to hate.
I will say that unless we, as loving Christians, step up to the plate and protect our most vulnerable, the countries where a little boy or little girl can be bought will continue to ply their trade in human beings. This means our own. It isn't something that only happens on the other side of the world! What do I do to stop this opportunity for those who would take advantage of it? How do I stir an indifferent world to make a stand and demand human trafficking stop?
Unless we, as Christians, teach our children their value...unless we are on guard for children around the globe and maintain an open dialog with them, the predators in our homes, our schools, our churches, our sports teams, will be able to continue the cycle of sexual abuse.
It is a learned behaviour after all.
There is zero help for these broken people to help them overcome their desires except to be condemned. How can we offer them the healing love of Jesus if we hate them?
I also want to add that yes, we are to pray and lift these troubles up to God. Remember, just as Jesus called His followers to unwrap Lazarus after he had risen from the grave when this was something He could have done Himself, we are called to get involved.
ReplyDelete