Friday, 31 August 2012

Peaks and Valleys by Susan

I have a roofer coming tonight to begin putting new shingles on my apparently rather leaky roof. I am thankful it has been a dry summer because most of the leaks didn't make it through to do damage to the inside of the house. Just 1 small patch and some slight discoloration in the paint are the only signs there was a problem. 2 weeks ago I noticed the damage in my living room and thought maybe the water was coming in around my chimney or around the vent pipe. Out came the extension ladder and up I went. My eyes drew level with the eaves trough. Then my chin. My heart gave a rather startling thumpity-thump and I knew there was absolutely no way I could check the roof myself. My mouth was as dry as the Sahara With fear. Sometimes being at the very peak can generate fear. With mental illness there is always that shadow when you are feeling well. When am I going to slide again? Sometimes it is all we can do to stay on the ladder. The wonderful thing is that there is a strong movement geared to mental health recovery. More and more tools, coping skills and opportunities are presented for those who wish to step onto the roof and find victory over their challenges. Check out: www.cultureofrecovery.org "Then your eyes shall be opened." Gen 3:5

Wednesday, 29 August 2012

An Ageless Tale by Susan

The crowd gathers around her, Fifteen feels like forty,fifty,a thousand, Who circle her, ensnare her chubby frame. There's no place to run as they push her from side to side Laughing with laughter sharpened by contempt, and hate,and spite. Her books scatter to the pavement of the empty schoolyard. Loose pages hiss in the late afternoon breeze as they scamper away. Tears of fear, of helpless rage, of shame course down her cheeks Raising more laughter. She feels so small as her head buzzes in panic: a trapped bird in a cage whose frantic heart hammers at its breast. The leader towers over her, smug with power and closes in, "Teach you to tell", of another day just the same but different... The voices echo down through history of another group of another nameless child all asking the same question, "Why? Why me?" The statistics are shocking. 91 percent of people living with mental illness have experienced some sort of trauma. Of that massive number 43 percent have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Bullying has a cost and not just the immediate price that's paid because like a corrupted savings account the initial deposits compound their interest over time.. I know, as kids,the future seems impossibly far away and Zero Tolerance is a good thing But when do we talk about compassion,respect? How do we instill the self respect and self esteem needed to help the bullies and their prey? Before it's too late and the life long damage is done. "Even A child is known by his deeds." Prov 20:11

Tuesday, 28 August 2012

No need for White-out by Susan

Miracles never cease. I actually figured out how to get to the page where I can write another post! Thank you all for being part of my learning curve. I was going to get all deep and philosophical but right now I'm enjoying my success and laughing a bit because of how scared I am of technology. Give me pen and paper and I'm all set. There is something satisfying about the feel of the sheet beneath a pen. I find the tactile closeness helps keep me focused.I love editing,too. When you cross something out it is gone but still visible. Maybe this is philisophical after all... I have been spending time at my high scool alumni Facebook site and am taking part in a coversation about the bullies who impacted so many of us growing up. For those who don't know me, I am a person living with Depression and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The Depression has been life long but only recently was it recognized. I am in recovery but it has been a long, tough road particularely for the last eight years. Part of my time on the Black River has led me into places I would sooner not have gone and exploring the impact of being bullied was one of them. They were the gateway to a whole world of ugliness I am sad to say but on the upside I took my pen and scratched them out one by one.And it felt good to reclaim the part of me who was hurt so badly. "Every branch that bears fruit He prunes." Jn 15:2

Monday, 27 August 2012

First Post...If technology cooperates by Susan

Fireflies,dragonflies and butterfly jewels, A hummingbird moth drinking at the bee balm, Only the third I've ever seen. Days and nights of brilliant splendour As August's meteor shower displays its silent fireworks. Towerimg trees whisper to the wind Their secret love song of summer. Cicadas,crickets, crawling things Add the music of their soul. But, Boy, it's hot! But look what I've got: Wildflowers dancing at the side of the road, Rippling and twisting in the heat. Cheeky daisies, the regal Queen Anne's Lace Nod and bow to the passing cars. Boy it's hot! But look what I've got: A break from mowing the lawn, now crisp and brown. Lazy hammock afternoons Fill the hottest part of the day In the shade of a lilac bush's umbrella, A sip of iced coffee, a good book, What more do I need? Boy it's hot! But look what I've got: Harvest stored in glistening jars: Strawberry jam, Some with a handful of rhubarb tossed in, Black currants shivver in the freezer Waiting for a cooler day to come alongside the strawberries, More beans than I'll ever eat, And the beets are eyeballing me Knowing they'll soon be in a pickle. The cukes didn't fare too well But that's okay, Zucchini canoes have taken their place. Did I mention it was hot? But look what I've got: A patch of four leafed clovers in my yard Not just one but dozens! A rare find I've seen before In my old life. And I am letting them grow just to see How big they'll get Before picking and pressing these treasures Sharing with family and friends: God's promise to restore all which the locusts had eaten It has been a special summer, The heat notwithstanding, Full of simple pleasures and pleasant times. This summer has been full of new beginnings. But most of all, like the jars in my pantry Set aside for tomorrow There is hope and whispered possibilities. For the first time in my life I dare to dream... Thankyou, Jesus